cool kid report

Every Wednesday, new comic books arrive at comic book stores and nerds line up to buy them and read the latest exploits of their favorite hero, explore strange worlds seldom considered in other media, or at least get a chance to see some newly drawn breasts. This is true in most of the US. Nerds who live in the Dakotas belong to a lower caste and have to wait until Thursday because UPS hates them. Normally, a nerd would have his pick of new Marvel comics reselling him a story he already knows and has read several times, or DC comics replacing old heroes with hipper, younger, modern versions of the same hero, or responding to sales by restoring the old hero from death and replacing the newer, hipper, less liked by the existing audience replacement. This was not a normal week at the comic book store.

This Wednesday, this nerd arrived eagerly at the comic store, knowing full well that no interesting comic books were shipping this week. Every comic there was either boring, childish, or bogged down by too much backstory for me to justify without first reading the entire backstory, a process which is much like pulling up an oak tree to get at its roots.

In the end, I bought a Star Wars comic book that looked moderately interesting and a JLA/Avengers comic that has been available for several months. Had I been so inclined I could have purchased several Spider-man or X-men comics, as at least three of each came out this week.

The only other item of note in the store this week were the two girls. This is primarily aberrant because they were neither parading around a small child nor waiting impatiently for an errant husband. No, these girls were more of the girlfriend/potential girlfriend disqualified by extra thirty pounds variety. This was reinforced by their extended conversation with a store employee. What drew these special ladies to this comicly informed retailer? Probably his mohawk or ability to pull multiple comics off the shelf for customers.

The aspect of thes girls that I noticed most was not their ability to exist in a comic book store or date a comic book reader, but the way the stood around, blocking an entire section of comics, as if they didn't notice the rest of the store. This is quite analagous to the way many much more attractive girls stand around the rest of the world. Its possibly one of these "hyper-girls" would also stand around a comic book store the same way, but in any know comic book store this type of girl quickly decays into two uglier and less annoying girls after a few milliseconds and is therefore they are never observed in such an environment.

So, instead of finding what I was hoping for at the comic book store, a lot of empty space between me and a rehashing of of the classic story of the offspring of Spider-man's costume, I got pretty much what I would have expected from the outside world. Next week, Avengers returns to its original numbering and there's (another) Rogue #1! It's going to be hard waiting an entire week for that.

Currently reading: Marvel Team-Up #10: Timebomb!
Shame of the day: New keyboard resisted my attempts to convert it to Dvorak.
Cubicle addition of the day: A new computer (!)